we went to egyt just to get our picture taken near the pyramids..lol:D

the picture strip..lol:D thats pretty weird.. because we didnt know how much time we had to pose..hehe:D we argued if we should get plain but i was like "its so plain..lol:D"

we also had a tour in paris.. but she had that picture:D

i'm so sorry if im acting all weird on you.. im sorry for everything that i did to you.. for annoying you.. for acting dumb.. whatever.. i don't know.. there's an urge in me to tell you everything inside me.. but i know its not gonna matter.. and everything will just be worse.. i hate you for giving me hope.. i hate you for being so kind to me.. i hate you for making me fall for you so bad.. i hate you for being you..now it's too late.. soon you'll be too busy to even bother to see all of us again.. and you know what hurts me more.. im holding on to the fact that you still both have feelings for each other.. but you guys wouldn't admit it.. if you're with us.. you're looking for her.. you know that feeling sucks.. and you just dont know how i feel inside.. but i guess i just have to accept the fact that there will never be "us".. but i hope you can feel that.. deep inside my heart.. there's a part that only you can fulfill.. only you can complete me..

i'm hecka happy coz alas! i was able to talk to leki! iloveyou crazy butt.. lol.. and imma see her on the 26th? or 24th?.. yipeeee!:D

5 days til my birthday!:D well.. i dont feel like celebrating.. but iono.. i guess imma go mall next week with my friends.. SPRING BREAK! well.. leki where have you been?!.. were you in milpitas all this time?!argh.. i wanna see you so bad.. and i wanna watch a movie with you.. dont tell me you watch disturbia yet.. coz im gonna bite you when i see you..lol:D well i just miss you all.. and im so random the whole day.. and til now.. goodnight!:d

they are most of my binhi family:D i forgot to edit it and place the names.. so imma just go from left to right.. KUYA MARLOWE, ATE GISELLE, ROY, ME, DIANA, RHEA-LYNN(the girl white white earing),ARMILY(the peace out girl), RAZEL, ADRIAN:D

yesterday was my annoversary.. and i didn't realize it til noon today.. and as my friend told me earlier.. now i can really say that "I MADE IT! I SURVIVED!:D"

and i guess i really did.. for one year.. i had great sorrows that almost took my life away.. such triumphant days and rewarding moments.. for a year i found myself.. my self that got lost for forever.. and im just happy:D really happy.. that at least i know.. who i am now.. is who i really want to be.. :D

let me give a brief description about my family:D

KUYA MARLOWE: he's my kuya 4 days after i came here.. he was the first one among them who welcomed me in my "family".. he make everybody laugh.. he got good things to say when everything's falling apart.. and lastly.. he got nice shoes! and im gonna steal them for sure..lol:D not unless he gives me one for my birthday..lol:D

ATE GISELLE: she's been our ate.. our mommy.. she got the power to make us feel guilty for something that we did wrong.. she got the words to say to make us feel alright.. she always checks on us like her little kids.. and no matter what.. we feel so safe with her:D and i just dont wanna lose her:D

ROY: he's my cousin actually.. like fourth? im not sure.. so yeah.. he's the guitarist of the family.. and he makes us laugh because of his reactions and hand gestures.. he's the life of the meetings:D

DIANA: she's only 12 and she's even taller than me..she's the athlete.. and she's really fun to be with:D

RHEA-LYNN: she has the most fashion among all of us.. lol.. nice clothes and hair.. but beyond all those.. she's my hyphy co-secretary.. but she's the SEXYtary.. coz she's hella skinny.. and she looks like her sister.. like really..

ARMILY: she's the singer of the family..she has the best voice ever..lol:D she knows when something's wrong and will come up to you and just ask you.. and of course try to make you feel better:D

RAZEL: another 12 year old girl that's taller than me.. she's the sister of the girl above.. and she's athletic too:D

ADRIAN: well.. he's that one guy that when he says something serious.. you're not gonna laugh at it.. it stays inside our hearts.. and it just inspires us.. i guess the shortest way to say this is.. his words are our inspiration whenever we're in the meeting:D

i love them really bad..

they have accepted me for who i was before.. and still promised to accept me for who i will be tomorrow.. and for the rest of my life.. i choose the things that i tell them about my "before" because for some part of my life.. i don't think it;s worth telling them.. and i am not really proud of it.:D i annoy them alot.. i try to make them laugh.. im all moody.. but still they're there for me:D

and i guess this is my song for them

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new and the reason is you
I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

a few weeks from now.. im gonna turn 15.. a year older.. a year wiser?.. a year stronger.. im about to pass 14 years of my life already.. but do i deserve to turn another year older.. do i act like im growing .. that im being more mature?.. i dont think so.. coz i feel like im being more like a kid.. that im seeing things hella different now.. but at least i knew along the way.. that there's more special things in store for you for as long as you continue living it.. that doing stupid things are not worth anything.. and not gonna do you any good.. i also learned that in life.. people come and go.. and it's not unusual for them to hurt you so bad that you wanna kill yourself.. but you wouldn't see the light until you compose yourself together again and continue living.. and along the way.. there's gonna be alot of people that actually cares for you but you just wouldn't know because your heart is still with the person who tried to steal your life and being.. but no matter what happen.. life is unpredictable.. we should be prepared for anything that would happen.. because nobody knows what will happen the next second in your life.. and i learned also that no matter what.. keep your strength inside.. be strong.. stand with your feet on the ground.. dont let anybody carry you through your journey.. learn to walk your own path.. and when you get lost you're the only one who can get yourself back in the track.. finish the race of life.. don't give up.. coz giving up wouldn't make you successful:D